nancylebov (nancylebov) wrote,

Squirrel and beet pulp vs. human intelligence

My favorite sort of humor seems to be about the universe ganging up on a defenseless human being. Give me a story of recalcitrant machines or animals or one of those interlocking screwball plots where everything comes together for mix of entropy and poetic justice, and I'm happy.

Here is a fine example of the former--with animals rather than machines.

Well, in our ongoing quest to turn this house into Noah's Ark, we have not only four horses, three dogs, four neurotic cats, a sulfur-crested cockatoo, a cockatiel and assorted toads, we also have William. William is a fox squirrel who absent-mindedly fell out of his tree as a blind and hairless baby two years ago and whom the vet promptly handed off to the only person he knew silly enough to traipse around with a baby squirrel and a bottle of Esbilac into her bookbag. Actually, the trick wasn't in keeping such a tiny creature warm, fed and clean---it was keeping a straight face and looking as mystified as everyone else when William woke up hungry and started pipping for his bottled like a very small, slightly muffled alarm clock. Invariably, this usually occurred while I was standing in line at the post office, picking up a pizza for dinner or on one memorable occasion, taking a final exam in biochemistry. Being no dummy, William knew a sucker when he saw one and has happily been an Urban Squirrel ever since.

Link found at a thread about When Squirrels Attack.

For more of such stuff, try The $64 Tomato, by a gardener with a little more energy and money than luck or forethought.

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